rhythm

In my previous entry, I wrote that returning to where you belong is one way of obtaining peace.  It reminded me of what another woman had said about "returning".

She had lost her husband to cancer and had been suffering from negative emotions that gave her sudden attacks and every time, she could only wait for them to pass.  But one spring day, she found a cherry bud while she was taking a walk in the park.  For some reason, she liked the bud, and went again and again to check the cherry tree.  And one day, as she looked at the bud, she suddenly realized that her fear, anger, and sorrow had lifted.

Despite the fact that her husband had died, and no matter how much she sank in sorrow, time passed, spring always came and flowers started blooming one by one.  Regardless of what happened to her, and no matter how much the society changed, there was this accurate rhythm that ticked away continuously -- it was always there, and it was going to be that way.

It wasn't resignation like when people say seasons come and go regardless of how much our lives change.  "I knew that I could return as long as I could feel this stable rhythm（ぶれないリズム）.  Maybe it's something like a metronome.  It encourages me and it makes me feel secure.  I can count on it where ever I go."

"Maybe there's no such thing as a stable mind.  We always live with an unstable mind.  But it's important to know that we can always come back from the instability.  When my heart suffers, I take a walk in the park until I can feel the rhythm and surrender myself to it."
-Wakako Kaneko（金子稚子）